Monthly Archives: December 2011

Automobile Weight Gain

The dudes from Maine are at it again. They have built a car that runs off of Coca-Cola and Mentos. Pure sugar. Awesome, now our cars are gonna get fat, too. We’re going to have to build bigger roads.

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Orphans

Can’t live with ’em, Easy to live without ’em. That’s why they’re Orphans.

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Celebrity Slavery Is A Very Real Thing

Here is Blake Lively out for a stroll. There is the man that must walk along side her holding her umbrella. Divas. Can’t stand ’em. It doesn’t matter how rich or poor you are. You look like a piece of … Continue reading

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Butt Slaps And High-Fives

It looks like the gang will be back and taking flight. Tom Cruise just divulged that a Top Gun sequel is not only in the works, but that he’s super duper excited about it. The director is currently working on … Continue reading

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My Dad Is Cooler Than Your Dad

A daycare in Conneticut discovered a joint in the lunchbox of an 18 month old toddler. John Sulzbach, a.k.a. father of the year, accidently dropped it in there while packing his kids lunch. Police were notified and a search of … Continue reading

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The End Is Near

Mother Earth is pissed, which is a shame .. because we’ve taken such good care of her. HEADLINE “With an almost biblical onslaught of twisters, floods, snow, drought, heat and wildfire, the U.S. in 2011 has seen more weather catastrophes … Continue reading

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CSI: Bolivia

An 18 year old kid, in Bolivia, jumped off a boat while intoxicated. He was then tore to shreds and killed by piranhas. Sad, disturbing and gross. Bolivia police have decided it was a suicide .. because the boy fished … Continue reading

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A Random Thought From Midgetspar

If someone says ‘I love you’ for the first time . . and you’re not ready to say ‘I love you, too’ . . just say ‘I love U2’ . . they’ll never know the difference.

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Penguins Like To Do It In The Butt

There is a Zoo in China. In this Zoo, there are two male penguins that live together. They are “gay”. These two penguins like to run around butt fucking each other all day. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that). … Continue reading

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The Class Of 2012

Guns N Roses, The Red Hot Chili Peppers, The Beastie Boys and some other humans got inducted into the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame today. Some band called “The Small Faces” also made it. I’ve never heard of them, … Continue reading

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