Taylor Swift Needs To Date Homeless People

Taylor Swift has been dumped. Again.

Taylor Swift gets dumped once every three months. How does this happen?

It’s one of three things:

A) She’s a total cunt
B) She’s retarded
C) She’s a retarded cunt

I’m going with “B”. Everyone knows she is far too stupid to be a cunt. Cunts are intelligent devious creatures. Taylor Swift, albeit sweet, is not intelligent.

Eddie Redmayne, her now ex-boyfriend, is an aspiring actor. I say “aspiring”, ’cause I’ve never heard of the guy.

Swift needs to stop dating famous people. Famous people can date and fuck whoever they want, whenever they want. She needs to song stalk some dude who will be so gloriously happy he bagged her, he’ll never leave or stray.

Any celebrity, even Joe Jonas, would leave Taylor Swift in a heartbeat .. for just ONE of Kat Dennings tits. Swift is adorable, but it’s painful to listen to her talk. She is vacant, unaware … and retarded.

You can take one of Kat Dennings tits shopping, while she waits at home with the other one.

I have totally sidetracked. I forgot what I was even posting about.

Boobs.

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